Tag Archive: Always In My Heart


…..nothing!  No blue line was visible in the tiny result window, waiting triumphantly to make her heart soar, to fill her with euphoric happiness.  With a sinking heart, she laid her head on the cold, cool sink counter.  She had been  sure this time she would see that evasive blue line appear, but again its lack of appearance taunted her! Turning her head forlornly towards the test stick laying still beside her, she angrily picked it up to hurl it into the trashcan.  Eager to be rid of the evidence of yet another failed attempt.  As her hand  reached for the mocking, reminder of her inability to achieve a positive result, she gasped in shock!  There before her strikingly bright, clear as the blue sky itself, shown a bold, discernible, solid, blue line!  It had been only seconds since checking the test, which had caused her such heartache, yet there was the result she had yearned to see for years! An honest to goodness  positive result!
     Tears of joy sprang from her eyes catching her unaware.  Her hands shook, as she cautiously carried her miraculous outcome, gripped gingerly in her hand, to show her husband. Walking slowly, feeling with every step she took, the line might disappear at any moment.  In complete disbelief that  this was really happening.  With sweaty, quivering hands she handed the precious test stick to her husband.  Barely capable of speech, she was only able to utter four words to him;
     “I think I’m pregnant!”
     Spent with emotional exhaustion, she collapsed into his arms, engulfed by his embrace, dissolving into sobs of joy.  Her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, shock over finally registering a positive result, planning how she’d share their news, dreaming of future holidays together, names for their baby, among various other idealistic thoughts experienced by a first-time mother. Her heart was light, she felt as if she was walking on air!
     The next 18 weeks flew by quickly.  She documented each week with photographs, she and her husband took a last vacation, a babymoon, if you will, to enjoy their last summer before the baby arrived.  She went a bit overboard in the baby shopping department, buying anything and everything for their future bundle of joy.  She experienced the joy of seeing her baby wiggling around inside of her on ultrasounds, and heard its heartbeat strong, and true for the first time.  She was in a wonderful bubble of euphoria, eventually sharing at 13 weeks, their happy news with anyone and everyone!
     Then the unthinkable happened at 18 1/2 weeks.  There was blood, and she knew what that meant.  A trip to the hospital confirmed her suspicions, her baby had stopped growing.  Her weeks of happiness, the future she had planned for her child was ended, all in a matter of seconds.  She felt robbed of her child, of her dreams for it.
     Days turned to weeks, a hollow emptiness consumed her, where her baby had once been.  Once happy and complete, she now felt lost, bereft of feeling.  Seeking comfort through her writing, she wrote her thoughts and feelings about her lost child.  This allowed her to find momentary reprieve from the sadness, her thoughts  transferred from her mind to the page.  Using writing as her security blanket to overcome this tragedy, slowly she began to heal.  She emerged a changed, person, but enduring an experience such as this changes anyone.  Through  her creative outlet of writing, she  further explored her other artistic gifts that had laid dormant through the years.  She left the world of professional workers focusing solely on her writing and photography, creating a writing company to commemorate her lost child, who through her death, helped her discover a new life!

*For more about my story visit awritersgallery.wordpress.com to read my raw, emotionally poignant, short story publication Always In My Heart in the featured showcase gallery section of the site.  Please leave a comment so I know you stopped by to read my story!

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/01/11/daily-prompt-challenge-cliffhanger-part-2-continued/

www.facebook.com/thepurplepen.36

https://pensivewriter2013.wordpress.com/2014/01/11/daily-prompt- challenge-cliffhanger-part-2-continued/

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Hello Fellow Bloggers! ๐Ÿ™‚

Happy 2014! I hope your new year has started off well and continues to be filled with wonderful moments!  Since I started the Zero to Hero Challenge with WordPress to create/improve blogs the first day challenge was to introduce myself, but since this blog has been established for awhile I decided to do more of an update.  The past few months leading up to 2014 have been very busy and exciting for me! I am still CEO of Rainbows of Happiness LLC where I write poetry, short stories, children’s literature, fiction, nonfiction, and self-help books, I recently became owner/moderator for the photography community Magnificent Moments Captured Through Film on Google+, was chosen as featured poet for the featured 4 section of MUTT Online by their staff, was selected to have my authored story Always In My Heart in the featured showcase gallery on awritersgallery.wordpress.com, have become a regular contributor for Smile magazine creating their cover story and articles, poetry contributor for The East Coast Literary Review Spring 2014 edition, Winter Solstice Initiative publication, and had three poems published on poetreecreations.org.  I now self-host 4 blogs on various social media platforms (3 on writing, 1 on photography), have created articles on various topics including fashion, photography, education, travel, health, home decor, exercise, skin care, jewelry, and shoes which were formatted and used on websites, blogs, magazines, and ezines.  My followers for this blog are just shy of 1,000 members, and I have formed connections with 1300+ people in the writing industry through LinkedIn! I can’t believe how much things have changed since starting out in Aug!  I have been highlighted as an aspiring author for Idea Creations Press and have an upcoming interview with Book Shelf in Feb 2014.  I received my official copyright certificate from the US Copyright Office and so this year plan to begin publishing my self-help books, and poetry compilations I had been waiting for to receive their copyright clearance.  I also have in the works two completed children’s books for my children’s literature series which I drew the initial character concepts for and am currently working on a book about positive classroom management techniques as well as another self-help book.  I continue to hone my photography skills daily, managing to capture some amazing scenic photographs.  I have become a member of the National Association of Professional Women, Fiction Writers Guild, Poets and Writers Association, Elance Network, Creative Writers Association, Google+ Small Business Owners, Yahoo Small Business Owners, Twitter, Rebel Mouse, Writer’s Beat, MUTT Online, Facebook for Businesses, Blogger, Skyword, Headliner, and Tumblr.  I participate in the weekly photo challenge on Daily Post, and the writing prompts as well, and did NaBloPoMo in November.  Whew! It’s been a busy couple of months! ๐Ÿ™‚
Here are my new sites to view my writing, photography, or posts:
https://pensivewriter2013.wordpress.com
http://www.facebook.com/rainbowsofhappiness2013
http://gettingthefinalword.wordpress.com
http://momentscapturedthroughthelens.wordpress.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/rainbowsofhappiness2013
http://thefinalpenstroke.blogspot.com
https://www.rebelmouse.com/rainbowsofhappiness2013/
http://rainbowsofhappiness2013.tumblr.com
Yahoo- http://www.thefinalpenstroke.com
Twitter handle- Pensivewriter2013
G+ handle- rainbowsofhappiness2013

Feel free to follow me on any of these social media platforms, like my posts, or comment.  If you are interested in photography professionals and amateurs are welcome to request to join my photography community on G+ Magnificent Moments Captured Through Film.

If you made it all the way to here, thank you! You are fabulous so here’s a magnificent photography piece to reward you for being so awesome!! ๐Ÿ™‚

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Reality harshly dawns, tears flow softly,
attempting in vain to cleanse the body of loss.
Heart aching in pain, steeped in longing,
yearning for a life; a brief glimpse of a face.
Unknown by your eyes,
familiar to your body.
Lost too soon; gone before this world,
Judged her, affected her, stole her innocence,
Forever pure, her soul remains untainted by time’s passage.
Vision of perfection in a mother’s heart,
the legacy of this missing link.
Every hope pinned to this angel’s existence,
washed away when she ceased to appear.
Heavy with grief’s burden,shoulders sag,
under the world’s weight, destined to revolve despite her lost love.
Internally struggling to stay afloat,
through waves of sadness, depression, and anger.
Wishing to exchange her presence, for a momentary glance,
upon the face of her child, anchored permanently to her heartstrings.
Willing to move Heaven and Earth,
to maintain that sacred connection.
The residual bond that eternally holds mother to child, surpassing earthly boundaries.
Felt strongest by the individual missing a piece of themselves,
the day the light of their lives was extinguished permanently.
Time advances, yet this cord of emotion,
remains forever attached.
Winding tightly around the heart,
reminder of what might have been.

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After being unplugged from the net due to being away from the country for the week, I’m back ready to continue promoting my short story publication Always In My Heartย  on awritersgallery.wordpress.com in the special features section of the site. ย I’m greatly humbled and appreciative of allย the positive comments and kind words from those of you that have already read my story and have been brave enough to share your own stories about loss as well! Thank you for that! If you haven’t read my newest short story Always In My Heart be sure to check it out at this link!

Always In My Heart.

A raw, poignant, emotional, special story of a mother’s loss of her first love her first child! Don’t forget the tissues! Thank you for the comments and likes on it! Please share Always In My Heart with someone you know who is dealing with a similar loss to help them realize they aare not alone in their grief and keep those beautiful stories and comments coming! They mean the world to me! Thank you for all of the support!

It’s official, my first short story publication, Always In My Heart is available to read on awritersgallery.wordpress.com today!! Always In My Heart is an emotionally charged and poignant story of a mother’s loss of her first love, her first child.  This story was a true labor of love & I would greatly appreciate it if you visited awritersgallery.wordpress.com to read it, and leave a comment.  I created the cover myself using my personal photography.  Please share Always In My Heart with friends and family members who may be suffering the loss of a child.  I wrote it to help others in the same situation.  Thank you for reading my first ever short story publication Always In My Heart on awritersgallery.wordpress.com today! Have a wonderful rest of the week!
Always In My Heart-My First Short Story Publication!

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